Thursday, January 23, 2014

Like Riding a Skate

I treat clichés like potholes – trying very hard, sometimes too hard – to avoid them.  Still, many little phrases have become trite because they have value.  When people say “It’s like riding a bike” you know what they mean.  It will come back to you.  What gets less attention are the converse statements.  The things people don’t say.  There is no idiom: “it’s like ice skating” Because skating ain’t like riding a bike. 

This past weekend I put on skates for the first time in 28 years.  I can’t speak for everyone – I’d like to but I can’t – so let’s just say for me this skill seems to have run off with all the French I ever knew.  I had no strong skating desire bubbling inside for 28 years.  I wanted to assist my seven-year-old who’s just learning.  Which left us both crashing to the ice and the boy saying, “You’re not much help.”  Cold, man.  And I was already pretty chilled.

Now I have a nice shiner and a bunch of other clichés to remember.  Smooth as ice.  The bigger they are, the harder they fall.  You should see the other guy.  (Actually, he’s fine.  He had a helmet.)  An once of prevention is worth a pound of “Hey, what happened to your face?"

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